Asking for what you need

A lot of yoga is about paying attention, noticing our bodies as we move, noticing our breath. There is also the teaching of paying attention to our thoughts.

In this time of giving, it can be easy to lose the awareness of what we need. How often do you ask yourself “What do I need right now?” This can be a powerful question/mantra. Slowing down to identify what we need in the moment – a snack, a nap, a cry, a laugh – can inform us on what action will be most useful. The momentum of life can carry us forward without this level of attention.

Somewhere along the line having needs got a bad reputation. We aren’t supposed to need anything right? If our basic needs are met – food, shelter, clothing, good wi-fi, etc. – then the focus should be on giving or taking care of others. When was the last time you asked for what you need – from yourself or others? How scary is the idea of asking others for what you need? Do you judge yourself poorly when you ask for help?

PRACTICE:

Take a moment now and close your eyes. Take a breath. Notice your body where you are. Slow down your mind enough that you can center yourself. Then ask, “What do I need right now?” Notice what comes up for you. Maybe a whole list of needs arose when you started paying attention. What is the essence of this message? Break it down to the smallest element/word.

Now take another minute! Before you jump up to fill that need, sit with what came up for you. Think about what you want to do to meet this identified need. Then think about your support system – what resources or people do you have/know that might help you fulfill this need? What would be the first step to filling your need? (Maybe there’s only one step!) Notice any feelings that come up when you think of taking this first step…relief, fear, worry? The feeling is telling you something as well.

After you have taken a moment to sit with what comes up, make a plan to get what you need. The idea is if you practice this awareness, this asking yourself what you need, you can be more mindful in your actions. You can choose the direction of your attention and energy to best serve yourself AND help take care of others. Give it a try and see what you find.

Take good care of yourself!

Much love,

Kim